The Art of Seduction pt 5

Alright, so you’ve sent the girl of your dreams a photo of your cock (The Art of Seduction pt 1).  You’ve sent her an amazing first email (The Art of Seduction pt 2).   You’ve gotten dressed and ready for your first date (The Art of Seduction pt 3).  You’ve chosen the location for your first date (The Art of Seduction pt 4).

So, you’ve gotten ready and are headed to your first date.  Don’t forget your wallet!  This will be important later.

Before you leave the house, review your date’s online profile.  Take notes on the highlights, interests, dislikes, and any quirks.  That will help keep you from getting her mixed up with all the other women on dating sites that you’ve been chatting with.  You definitely don’t want to get BDSMon.myA$$666 confused with PeaceLoveandHarmony03.  Take down the notes on small, discrete cards that are easily concealed. Continue reading

The Art of Seduction pt 4

Alright, so you’ve sent the girl of your dreams a photo of your cock (The Art of Seduction pt 1).  You’ve sent her an amazing first email (The Art of Seduction pt 2).   You’ve gotten dressed and ready for your first date (The Art of Seduction pt 3).

Now it’s time to pick a location.  There are a couple good reasons that you should choose the location instead of letting your date.

First, it’s always better to choose a place closer to where she lives.  That way if things go really well the two of you end up at her place because it’s closer.  Her place is better because you really don’t want her to see the pile of “happy socks” by your bed, the toilet that hasn’t been scrubbed in years, the pile of pizza boxes by the door, the overflowing recycle bin full of beer bottles, and the dishes that are growing rare strains of bacteria in your sink.  Those kinds of things will definitely kill the mood.

Secondly, chicks like it when you show initiative.  By picking the location she thinks you’re a little more assertive, more driven, and opinionated than you actually are.  If you tell your date that you don’t care where you go she will probably think that you’re a lazy, slacking, un-opinionated loser… unless you’re suave like me and say something like “No, babe.  I don’t care where we go as long as I get to spend that time with you.”  Shit like that makes chicks wet.

Ok, so it’s a good idea for you to pick the location, but how do you chose? Continue reading

The Art of Seduction pt 3

Alright, so you’ve sent the girl of your dreams a photo of your cock (The Art of Seduction pt 1).  You’ve sent her an amazing first email (The Art of Seduction pt 2).  Excellent, you’re well on your way to meeting the woman of your dreams.

After that first email, the two of you exchanged a few more until you decided that it’s time to meet in person.


This is a critical time, you’ve gotten her interest piqued but you really need to make a good first impression.  She liked your cock shot, she liked your emails, so she’s hooked but you can still screw this up if you don’t follow some simple guidelines.

The first rule of dating is not “don’t talk about dating”, it’s brush your fucking teeth.  Before anything else, choosing your best sexy wear, before choosing a romantic location, before sticking the expired condom in your wallet, if you don’t have amazing breath you will never hit first base.  And first base is important because if you’re good you can steal second and maybe third before she catches on.

Ok, you brushed your teeth, now it’s time to get dressed.  Wear clothes that are age appropriate, fit properly, and most importantly don’t represent any of the various gangs in your area.  I mean, how embarrassing would that be if the two of you show up in rival gang colors?  So, neutral colors like black and gray are advisable. Continue reading

The Art of Seduction pt 2

Ok, if you’ve read The Art of Seduction pt 1 then you have already sent your online love interest a photo of your cock.  Now what?

First, you wait for a response.  If she doesn’t send you a message back in the next 20 minutes or so, continue to send the cock shots periodically over the next 24-48 hours.  Sooner or later she’ll write, the constant cock shots always works.

Your computer pings, you’ve got mail!  She’s responded!  Inter-gender communication can now begin, put on your dance shoes and pull out your thesaurus (or same gender communication if you swing that way). There you are, poised over your keyboard, the blank email screen lit up in front of you…  Umm…?  You could send another cock shot, but that’s kind of a cop-out.  You’ve hooked her, now you need to seal the deal.  But what do you write?

On writing s

First, put her name or screen name.  Spell the name or screen name correctly, this is important because it shows you are interested enough to learn how to spell it.  Then a comma and hit the return key.  Your screen should look something like this: Continue reading

The Art of Seduction

Ok, guys, what’s the most important part of an online seduction?  The cock shot, obviously.

Seduction is an art, it involves good conversational skills, a decent vocabulary, and maybe some good Star Wars trivia.  You have to be equal parts fun, funny, witty, and charming.  It takes time and effort.  What?  You don’t want to spend any time or effort being fun, funny, witty, and/or charming?  No problem.  Just send your prospective love a photo of your cock.

The problem is you can’t just send any cock shot.  It needs to be evocative, strong, emotionally moving, intellectually riveting, sexy, and yet tasteful.  How do you accomplish all this?  I’ll show you.

Now, I really wanted to put up a large variety of cock shots with various differences; angle, focus, lighting, circumcised, non-circumcised, and  maybe some colorful frames (there’s apps for that) to do some side by side comparisons, but it turns out that I really don’t like looking at cocks.  I mean, there’s nothing inherently wrong with them but when faced with the prospect of hours of cock-shot searching to lay out my comparisons I had to fight down a sudden surge to vomit.  And vomiting on my laptop would put an abrupt end to my burgeoning online blogging stardom.  How women find cocks remotely appealing I’ll never know.  But they do and that’s why we send pictures of them. Continue reading