Conservative Hypocrisy


I read an article today that irked me.  This happens most days, which is why that cabin in the middle of nowhere seems more and more hospitable.

The article is an “idea” piece for the Time website: “Orthodox Christians Must Now Learn to Live As Exiles in Our Own Country“.  Essentially the piece is about how marriage and societal views have shifted away from the writer’s values, as though he and those like him are somehow now an impacted minority. Continue reading

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I can be an asshole sometimes


I often tell people I’m an asshole, it’s surprising how few people believe that.  I might not be one all the time but I have flashes just like everyone else.

This evening I was having dinner with Stephanie.  She was talking about how videos were more and more common, cameras everywhere.  In some ways that’s pretty awesome, the ability to hold everyone accountable for their actions and record meaningful events.  On the other hand it’s a terrifying, 1984-esque concept.  It led to the following conversation.

Stephanie: “Someday soon we’re all going to be recorded 24/7, all accountability all the time.”

Me: “No way, uh uh.  I’ll move to a tiny cabin in the middle of nowhere if we ever reach a situation even close to that.”

(That’s not an uncommon comment from me, I often talk about how I’d rather be a hermit than live in a society I don’t like.  Which is more and more likely every day.)

Stephanie gave me a sly look: “You always picture yourself alone in that cabin or do you see someone else with you?”

I thought about that for a moment before giving her the honest answer:  “Nope, all alone.”

That pretty much ended our almost romantic evening.  No regrets.

Jurassic World


I don’t usually do reviews of things but I’ve decided to make an exception.

Did you know that Michael Crichton died a few years back?  Yeah, I hadn’t known either until I checked his Wikipedia page two years ago, looking for some other piece of information, and was startled to see that he’d passed.  How was that not huge news?  How did I not know about that?  He’s one of my favorite writers and insanely talented (he was also a Doctor, all around talented).  I’m a huge fan of Michael Crichton’s work and an equally big fan of the first Jurassic Park movie and the books.

All that to say, I hope he’s looking down and laughing at the people who put together Jurassic World. Continue reading

Quotes and generalizations


“Show me a loyal husband and I’ll show you one who’s never had a real opportunity to stray.” – Bel Mooney

I saw the above quote on a blog today… and it’s a little hard to explain how fucking angry it made me.  Not the post itself, that was fine, just the quote.  Similar statements are unfortunately common, we see them all the time, but this one very specifically pissed me off.  Really, the sexism (and cynicism) in that single line made me want to puke and then punch someone in the face.
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When I got married I was totally in love, head over heels, dedicated to her.  I did everything “right”, making sure she was taken care of, I treated her like a princess, I was responsible, respectful but fun, romantic, patient and caring… And to make sure I could take care of her I joined the Navy.  Good money, benefits, etc.  We moved far away from home, two newlyweds on an adventure.

Continue reading

Why I’m terrified of this Presidential election


When I was growing up I never followed politics or the news.  We lived in a small town in the middle of nowhere, all the headlines took place in a different world.

All that changed when I joined the military.  It didn’t take long to realize that politics and world news had a huge impact on my life.  Invading Iraq?  Oh, shit.  Bush was reelected?  Oh, shit.  And all those weird places they talked about on the news?  Yeah, I’ve been there, I’ve met people there, I’ve got the t-shirt.  Everything became relevant, I started really paying attention to what was going on around the world.

Most of the time when I notice headlines about politics my reaction varies between mild disgust, surprise, and disappointment.  It’s not often that politics scares me, but I’m terrified about the next US election.  Terrified.  I haven’t been this worried since Bush won a second term. Continue reading

Stephanie


I haven’t written much about Stephanie other than briefly mentioning her in other posts.  There hasn’t been much to write about, really.  And I don’t really know what to say about her.  I’m struggling a bit and that’s unusual for me.

First off, there’s nothing wrong with her and I don’t mean this as a criticism of her.  If anything, the lackluster “relationship” is more a reflection on me.  She’s a successful woman, close to my age, easy to get along with, nice, has good friends and is interested in many of the things I am.  She’s not perfect but on paper she’s a good match for me.  However, what looks good on paper doesn’t always play out that way in real life.

Again, that’s more my fault than hers.

I met Stephanie at pretty much exactly the wrong time.  Over the last couple years I’ve had too many ups and downs, I’m exhausted.  I’m jaded.  I’m cynical.  I’m overwhelmed.  I’m so emotionally detached right now that I have zero interest in being in a relationship.  At all.  Period.  With anyone.   Sex doesn’t even interest me right now because of all the things that come with it.

She asked about how my parents were doing after my grandma died.  I told her.  She wanted to send them a little care package.  I just shrugged that off, I don’t want to have anyone I’m casually dating involved with my family, but that’s the type of person she is.

The other night she sent a brief “good night” text around dinner time.  Now, knowing her as I do, I’m sure she was going to dinner with a friend.  I didn’t ask because I didn’t really care.  A short while later a though occurred to me, she could be cheating.  It was a brief thought, more of an internal joke than anything else, but my response to that thought was remarkable.  I laughed.  There were no flashes of jealousy, no disappointment, or anything like that.  I thought if it turned out she was cheating that would be funny.  It was be an interesting twist to the situation.  She isn’t, she isn’t the type, but it would be funny if she was.

Yeah, you could say I’m detached.  I’m not sure if this is a temporary situation or the new normal but at the moment it’s kind of liberating.  I don’t care.  I could just as easily be single at the moment, and that might even be preferable.